NTA means not to be answered. Use it in place of a pest’s name in your mobile. Do not pick up the phone. Do not even think about it. Leave it alone. Let it ring on the dresser. Hide it under a pillow. Leave the room until it stops. There are many NTAs in this world, but my favourite is an acquaintance a friend made in Sylhet. Let’s call him Noddy. A few days ago he sent this little gem by text: ‘Hello “MATT” How are you? I am well. I hope you are well. Next news, I call your mobile: no: but you not receive, why? You are my FRIEND. I all time missed you. I and you journey to MADOAB KUNDO. Photo album I and you, big size one copy want. I wish you every success in life. FOR GET ME NOT.’ Before I translate this heartfelt missive, here’s a little background. Noddy is a tour guide based in Sylhet, a city in north Bangladesh. He took a friend of mine to a famous waterfall spending little more than an afternoon with him. Now, the translation: ‘Hello “MATT” If that is your name! How are you? I am well. I hope you are well. I’m getting on very well without you. Next news, I call your mobile: no: but you not receive, why? Are you ignoring me? You are my FRIEND. Guilt trip. I all time missed you. I am a needy black hole of love. I and you journey to MADOAB KUNDO. Don’t you remember the good times we had together? Photo album I and you, big size one copy want. Without this, I’m not serious. The other stalkers will laugh at me. I wish you every success in life. Weep! FOR GET ME NOT. And now I end it all. Goodbye.’
November 20, 2006 at 5:23 am
I’ve got one of those. He started off as an innocent taxi driver, and now has the words “Taxi driver – do not call” logged in my phone instead of his name. Don’t wanna delete him in case he rings and I don’t recognise it and I pick up by mistake…
There’s another down in my phone entitled “mystery maldivian” since I have no idea who it is but apparently he knows me because he’s seen me in the street by Care Society, and since this whole island is so small and networked, it appears to be quite easy to get phone numbers through the main phone company of people you’ve spotted. Great…. He appears merely to want to know my views on globalisation…
November 22, 2006 at 2:23 pm
I think that this post requires some explaination of, for instance, the rose text message.
November 23, 2006 at 7:49 am
Oh, I wonder who that mystery person is in this here post Rorie?
The rose text message that Emily (hi by the way) refers to is from the same guy (yes guy notice), Nobby and read something like this…
“Hold 11 roses and look in the mirror. You will see 12. The rose in the middle is you.”
Now you all understand why we do not answer the phone to this man. Oh Bangla……